Journalling to My Self - Part III

I have no special time to write, no particular topics, and especially no set amount a day. This is my best friend remember. Unconditional love on both sides. And because I get to be really who I am, it becomes a joy to visit, a treat to pick up and write a little, and yes, a huge comfort at three o'clock in the morning when I feel very, very alone and the dog is snoring soundly in my ear. My journal is my friend, my confidante. I have always been able to see things more clearly when I am writing them down. It calms me, and helps me to feel all the things that I'm trying not to feel. I don't seem to be able to fool myself when I write. It helps me see myself differently. My journal is my reflection, a mirror to the inner part of me. When I look back over the pages at a later time I can relive the good, positive feelings I had about myself, I can actually see the changes that are coming about, and sometimes, just sometimes, I catch a glimpse of the wonderful person within. Why journalling? Because however honest I like to think I am, to a certain extent I can still B.S. my way through or out of most things. Especially when it involves my own stuff. When I write, it's really, really hard to lie. And when I do, I know full well what I'm doing. And word by word, journal by journal, I find that I am becoming more true ... to my self.
©2000 Shena Meadowcroft